It's really strange how the mind of someone with a mental illness works! For example, a person experiencing hallucinations (whether it be auditory, visual, tactile, etc.) really truly and honestly believe they are seeing, hearing, or feeling things. For example, one of the patients with schizophrenia kept insisting she was pregnant despite the fact that her pregnancy test was negative. "Who is the father?" and she replied "the angel". She was seen mumbling to herself and when asked "who are you speaking to and where is this person?" she said "the angel and he is always here with me" as she continued to look to the corner of the ceiling. I'm honestly getting the heebee geebes just typing this...
We do have scientific explanations for such bizarre behaviors but it's hard to believe that an imbalance of neurotransmitters (as well as several other factors, all of which are not completely understood) could cause such changes in behavior and delusions and hallucinations that are all so very real to a person...
How do you convince a person that what they're experiencing is not "real" when they are absolutely convinced themselves that it is...

Well obviously we've got medications and psychotherapy and whatnot...but still! crazy!

-Abbie!

(i started writing this last week and forgot to finish..)
Well, winter break has officially come to an end. I had a test today (second day of class) and so it has really sunken in.. bye bye break. It was an amazing one filled with lots of going out but at the same time lots of resting which was very much needed after a long, torturous second semester.

Winter break consisted of...

working a lot, yogurt trips, IAG Christmas karaoke party, Ra Sushi, Yardhouse happy hour, Monster Sushi happy hour, renting a bunch of movies, going out to the movies, LA, Christmas with the family, downtown fullerton (and silly drunkeness), sleeping through the new year, Las Vegas (buffets, penny slots, free drinks, clubbing, jungle woman, shopping), Mammoth (snowboarding for the first time!), and hanging out with family from Australia (up all night playing guitar hero world tour, Melrose, fun car rides) etc.

and now it's back to school.. woo.

you know, although break is a billion times better/funner than going to school i actually kind of missed it. just a little bit. learning is actually exciting sometimes. i'm excited for the new skills we'll be learning such as inserting IVs and doing blood draws. man, i'm really going to feel like a nurse. eeep. scary!

Third semester. One more year! I swear it was just yesterday when i first started. I'm sooo anxious to graduate but at the same time i'm fearful of the real world. I just can't picture me being "grown up". Oh, the time is coming way too soon.

I've been sucking at posting up pictures due to the fact that my computer has gone crazy and my pictures are scattered all over different computers and different hardrives and i can't remember where i've been uploading them! i'll try harder next time.

weird. have i really been a pescatarian for two years now? crazy! i used to LOVE meat. korean bbq, chicken strips, carne asada, etc. and i haven't eaten any of that in two whole years?!

i'm just glad i didn't give up sushi. although if i did, i would be saving a LOT of money considering how often i eat it.. bah. weakness :(

i'll blog about winter break soon enough. it's been really fun and sadly it will soon come to an end. garrrr.

I realize that whenever something stresses me out the way i handle it is by trying not to think about it which is pretty stupid I guess since it really doesn't fix the problem.
My laptop decided to get all cray cray on me and there was no way I could even get to the desktop to attempt to fix it. I noticed a few problems such as constant pop ups and how it started to run slower awhile ago I decided to ignore it... until finally it just crashed.
And of course I had absolutely nothing backed up. I started to freak out because my whole life (aka pictures and schoolwork) was all in there.
Me being completely computer retarded had no idea what to do. I couldn't even think of any possible problems and any possible solutions. ughh.
Thankfully Julian is the best and helped me out, except I had to wait a whole week because he was back home. So i spent about 100 bucks on an external hardrive and used a different program to back up all my shit. Thank the LAWD it was still all there.

So.. i think i know what my new years resolution is going to be..
I would like to try to be more tech saavy. Shit, or at least somewhat more knowledgeable on computers. Hopefully this way I can avoid problems or at least learn to fix them on my own. Oh, and to not avoid problems thinking it will fix itself on its own.

OH. i got an 84 out of 100. BALLLAA! wow i really sound braggy. i'm sorry really. im not usually. it was just a very exciting day. k bye. why am i writing in this like an instant message.
PEACE

How could i forget to mention that the last few weeks before school ended i studied my ASSSSS off! OH. because that's my life ALL the time.
The night before my final i stayed at the USC library until 12am to study. got home and studied for two more hours. woke up at 4 to study and got to school by 6:30 to study until 9:30. took the damn final AT LAST and thought i was going to shit in my pants bc it was the hardest test i'd ever taken. 100 questions.
Waited around bc they said the results would be ready in two hours. ate at little tokyo with a buncha people and had cold sake for the first time. shitty. got to school and waited a billion more hours. FINALLY they call out our names and WTF. I was worried about not even passing the class and instead i raised my grade from a C to a B! ARE YOU SERIOUS? everyone prays to just get by with a C. C=RN. lol. ok i really don't mean to sound like i'm bragging but i was seeerriously in disbelief! ahhhhh. and now i can relax. and i haaave been. love it. OH I LOVE BREAK.

i think i may part ways with blogspot soon.

I absolutely LOVE winter break! It's such a strange feeling to not have to worry about studying. I almost feel useless. I'd like to feel this way forever!

I've done so much more these last 5 days of break than i did all semester long. And it's not that i've been out doing crazy things and traveling the world or anything. I've just not been couped up in my room or at a borders or barnes and noble stressing my brains out about the next quiz or test. It's wonderful.

Aimee's back from Germany! Yay! I think i've seen her everyday of my break. I'm so excited she's back. Now i have friends to play with.

I'm just going to list what i've done (mostly for the purpose of me remembering what i did winter break). nothing exciting really.

Thursday- IAG Christmas party at a korean karaoke place. Best night ever! i LOVE the IAG crew!

Friday- Party at Diva's

Saturday- Ra Sushi bar in Torrance with Aimee

Sunday- I don't remember... ugh. what the hell did i do?

Monday- LA/Arclight with Julian to see Slumdog Millionaire. Amazing! one of my new fav movies for suuure!

Tuesday- Downtown Fullerton with Aimee

Wednesday- Nothing really. helped make yummy ceviche with my mom!

Lame entry. I'll post a more meaningful one with pics later.